Tying the Knot day 1

The bride with her father and mother. The Brahman, or priest is in the foreground

You know it is hot when a South Indian tells you it's hot. And that's just how hot it was on Saturday when we boarded the chartered bus that would take us to our first Indian marriage.

We left our apartment at noon and hurried by auto into Hyderabad proper to catch the aforementioned bus. It was a bumpy, gritty, teeth clenching, 45 minute ride, but I was relieved we had made it with time to spare. We were whisked into the home of the groom's uncle and immediately served with a plate of food and a hot cup of tea.

Finally at 4pm (1.5 hours behind schedule - or right on time in India) we were rushed to the bus which would carry us along with the entire groom's family to the wedding. Part of the delay involved the blessing of the bus, which was adorned in marigold garlands, and a ceremonial coconut - I did not get an opportunity to ask about the coconut.

"Please Sir, please Madame it is beginning to rain." On to the bus we rushed as the afternoon monsoon began. A little rain (even monsoon rain) never bothered anyone... but the bus was not air conditioned and the windows were our only source of fresh air. As we sat waiting for the bus to load you can imagine how quickly it became very, very hot. As if the stifling heat were not enough, some of the windows began to leak copious amounts of water onto our seats. The combination of the human heat, the muggy air and the lack of air movement was nearly intolerable. Finally, finally after more delays 45 minutes after we boarded, the bus began to move. Once moving the air from the windows made the temperature tolerable, albeit sticky.

After 3 hours we reached our destination, a village called Miryalaguda located about 150 km south of Hyderabad. After a quick shower to remove the road grime we headed to the function hall for the evenings festivities, it was 9 pm and hot. The kind of arresting unbearable heat you get on a still bus with no a/c, only this time we were in open air...

However, the uncomfortable heat temporarily took a backseat to the sensory feast happening around us. Like all things in India this celebration was a display of sights, sounds , smells and tastes unlike any other I had experienced. The music, the intoxicating scent of Jasmine hanging heavily in the air, the heat - I truly felt like I had been transported to a different place in time and space.

The bride's family greeted our bus and adorned each of us with a tikka - the red dot - on the forehead. Each of us, except Evan - he wanted no part of anyone touching him. A 5 piece band - consisting of 2 different drums, a couple of very unique reeded horns, and some sort of squeeze box that resembled a large black book opening and closing - played the traditional wedding music as we walked from the bus to the hall.

The men and women were adorned in beautiful traditional dress. The women wore richly brocaded saris of every imaginable color, almost all of them in silk. They all wore jasmine flowers in their hair, and their finest gold jewelry. The men of the wedding party wore traditional dhotis of rich white silk.

The puja, or prayers and ritual commenced immediately in a small, un-air conditioned room on the second floor of the building. We were brought to the the front and given seats of honor. The bride's father greeted us happily telling us in broken English how honored he was to have us present at his daughter's marriage. The evening's ritual was loud, jostling, and playful, lasting almost 2 hours. The bride and groom each surrounded by their respective families slowly and playfully walked toward each other, hoping to meet in the middle. If they met too far onto the groom's side, this would mean the bride would be too dominate, too far on the bride's side the opposite would be true. The idea, of course, was to meet in the middle to achieve a balance in the marriage. With the families pushing and pulling it became a playful act lasting for quite some time. And did I mention the heat? It enveloped us in it's unwelcome embrace all evening. Despite the heat and noise Eli fell fast asleep - sweating and sticking to me. Evan, tired, drenched in sweat and overwhelmed eventually found some children to play with, and given the circumstances was relatively well behaved.

Following the puja there was a traditional South Indian feast - rich, spicy, and finally, delectably sweet. By the time we finished dinner it was midnight. At the conclusion of day 1 we knew Sunday would be a long day, we just could not have known how long it would turn out to be...